novembre ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- a need to be less old lady/feline/fragmented i really want to move. not away from my lake, but to a different building. into an apartment not half-renovated in the 1980s, making the bathroom tile four different ugly colors and my bedroom walls the consistency of cottage cheese. where i can't hear the upstairs neighbor's answering machine, footsteps, laughter, sex. to start over in this way is so appealing. a new space. i'd paint it, because lately i've painted everything else. i'd go through everything i own and divide by half. so many things have changed this year; i guess i'm just wishing i could change everything, for consistency's sake. 2:17 pm - 09.15.03 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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