novembre ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- headache from 96 teardrops perhaps i am incompetent at everything requiring a schedule. i get things done, just slowly. i missed work again and got fired. cried in the bathroom and felt like i should have been in a bad WB show. then the cat from sabrina the teenage witch would come and make me feel better. afterwards i sat on the roof and thought about everything that went wrong in the past year, how the bad always seems to overshadow the good. i wrote a note of apology to my old boss-but-still-friend, my hands shaking and cold. my red sweatshirt rode up my back and the patch of skin between shirt and jeans became numb. i remember getting a tattoo on my back just so people would have something to look at when i sat down, but the tattoo was placed too high and its always hidden by shirt. but it's okay, everything is okay. i just feel a little worthless right now is all. i miss my friends but i don't want to talk to anybody, i just feel like wandering around and trying to get things done on time. all week the weather has been warm. weathermen look very pleased with themselves, like they created the sunbeams. yesterday was windy and a little cooler. today is sunny and cold at the same time, my skin is confused, sitting on the roof under direct sunlight, freezing my lower back off. i'll get another job. hell, i might even get another tattoo. lower this time. you have to roll with the punches otherwise you get stuck feeling like the only thing that will save you is a talking cat. 11:59 am - 2.7.01 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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